THE Number
The other day I got to talking with a friend about numbers - well, actually THE number - how people think about it, if it matters, why it matters if it does, and how some people have real issue with the number while others don't.
He told me there was a rule of thumb. When discussing how many people someone has been sexual with, you double the number a woman gives and triple the number a man gives. I didn't know this! *laughing* I always just give the real number - be ok with it, don't, whatever, it's your choice... but I do know women and men who skirt the issue.
Personally, the number is not relevant to me in terms of making some moral judgement, not at all. I ask because sexuality fascinates me. The experiences we've had, who we choose to share them with, why we choose them, and how we feel about it afterwards all shape our sexual identity, all provide great insight into the inner workings of a person. I love knowing the details - the facts and the feelings.
I have a guy friend who doesn't want a chick who has had more than 10 men. He's never been able to really justify where the number came from and why it matters. I question if it would REALLY matter, once the involvement was in motion. He, by the way, has had MANY women! *laughing*
So I'm curious what y'all think about the number.
He told me there was a rule of thumb. When discussing how many people someone has been sexual with, you double the number a woman gives and triple the number a man gives. I didn't know this! *laughing* I always just give the real number - be ok with it, don't, whatever, it's your choice... but I do know women and men who skirt the issue.
Personally, the number is not relevant to me in terms of making some moral judgement, not at all. I ask because sexuality fascinates me. The experiences we've had, who we choose to share them with, why we choose them, and how we feel about it afterwards all shape our sexual identity, all provide great insight into the inner workings of a person. I love knowing the details - the facts and the feelings.
I have a guy friend who doesn't want a chick who has had more than 10 men. He's never been able to really justify where the number came from and why it matters. I question if it would REALLY matter, once the involvement was in motion. He, by the way, has had MANY women! *laughing*
So I'm curious what y'all think about the number.
posted by MysticSpirit (Sass) at 8:31 AM
9 Comments:
From my experience there are a lot of broken girls out there who regret their first few sexual encounters. Then there are those who difiantly say they don't regret it but when mentioned, they become upset or uncomfortable. My being one of those nice-guys-finish-last types, causes me to be in the scenario of comforting such cases. Too many people make too many mistakes when they are young when the truth is, they knew better the whole time. Personally I wouldn't want to sleep with anyone who has had any more than 3 partners, and I would expect them to ask the same of me. Sex isn't a game. It's an emotional, passionate, spiritual experience between lovers. But hey.. that's just my sentiment on the subject.
Interesting. What's your number?
I would have thought that men would be more likely to exaggerate the number of sexual partners they've had.
My number? Well, since the age of 16 I have probably not gone for more than three or four months at a time without having sex. But my number is only three. Only one of those was a one night stand.
There were two 'very nearlys' though - should they get a half each? In which case make it four.
(I know you didn't ask people go give their numbers, but I thought I'd give it anyway).
ed... thank you for sharing *grin* my number...? well... I can still use digits to count em, but it's more than 3 - though none have been the hook up one night stand with a stranger thing, always someone I know, usually someone I'm very close to
lycan... welcome *smiling*... I'm curious... if you met someone amazing, just really 'all that' on all levels of the human condition that matter to you, but she'd been with 5 or 6 or whatever... would you discount the possibility of a relationship?
ss... not knowing your husband's number fascinates me... and yes, makes sense you're being true to you, nothing else matters *smiling*
man-slut! *giggling*
you're awesome!
I've never told anyone my number. No one. And I don't know it because the number matters but I haven't forgotten any of them.
I don't know my number for sure. Its reasonably high though...more than 15.
A woman's number would make no difference at all to me. Who am I to judge?
My husband doesn't know my number and I don't care to know his.
I once told a boyfriend what my number was and he almost dumped me. I've never told another soul.
I've been finding all these interesting blogs lately! (Found you through Edge's interview on Rick's blog.)
I think men have more of a problem with knowing the numbers than women. I like hearing about my husbands past experiences but he never asks nor wants to know about mine.
Hmm. I always thought myself deficient I've had 10 lovers in my life, but all but two were one-nighters.
I never wanted to know how many my ex racked up before me ... the trouble was she didn't stop after we got married. Such is life.
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