Guilt

I want to preface this post with something of a disclaimer - I want it clear that I am not judging those that don't 'process' things in the same way as I do. I don't have condemnation or contempt or anything similar in my heart, I simply wanted to write about something I see SO much of - in blog posts and in the world, and would be interested to know how others do or don't do guilt, that's all.

I read a post this morning that got me percolating about guilt. I see it weighing people down, I see it creating self-loathing, I see it wounding, I see it fermenting then transforming into fear, which is debilitating. It makes me sad the degree to which people seem to carry guilt with them, the way it seems to permeate the good things with its stench.

I don't DO guilt. Really. I don't. I don't see the point. That isn't to say I don't feel badly about things sometimes, if I've hurt someone. I have looked back on times in my life and seen a better way (now I'm old and wise! *laughing*) but that doesn't equate to guilt or shame or even regret.
I see guilt as negative. It's only possible purpose would be to redirect us, but more often, it becomes a fixture. It's a victim thing. I see people carry around this suitcase of it, sometimes taking it out to feed it, nurture it, grow it... then back in the case, the weight of it greater than before, the poison more powerful. Rather than stimulating different behavior, it's something we punish ourselves with, a reminder of our belief we are 'less than' - proof we are not worthy. It serves some of us well in the short term, but the price paid is massive. It's a great excuse. We can pummel ourselves enough with it that we don't require ourselves to be accountable and responsible for the choices that got us here, and the choices we can make to take us elsewhere, or not.

Temporary guilt is one thing - you look at something decide it wasn't the best choice - you correct it if possible, or choose differently next time and move on. Permanent guilt, is a cop out, it has nothing to offer and is steeped in passivity.

There is something the core of me, a product of evolution I'm sure, that makes me incapable of stagnation, of sitting in misery for any length of time. I'm grateful for it, and proud of the work I did to get here, and humbled when I'm knocked down and have to face it all, test the philosophy... when the world says "OK girl, let's see whatcha got."

My Dad used to say "honesty, integrity - that's what you do when no one is looking and you can't get caught." I think that stuck, early, so I live like that. Great peace in that, huge. Thank you Dad!